HAND: Content / My Story.

Mommy2angels Thu 30 Jul 09
No one remembers, I cannot say why Only thing I keep thinking Is that nobody tried I cried, yelled, screamed You were mine both mine only mine!! No one knew you two like me I don't know why He couldn't Just let you be We shared so much In our short time together, And the time that we shared Has made memories forever So much I learned, Dreams, Hopes, I lost Everything turned, toppled And tossed Butterfly flutters, then turns And kicks . . . Then, that horrifying day . . . Was my mind playing tricks Was this a game you two play? As the ultrasound tech comes I pray just move please babies just one of you leave me from this nightmare No cry, no movement, not even a Breath . . . As you lay on in tummy Now they induce my labor I feel so numb how can this be Still not beliving this Aaliyah you are our 1st born you loved to kick punch me SHOW THEM that what they are saying is wrong do something Nevaeh our food stealer you loved to eat cry let them know that your hungry Breath Move Anything IM BEGGING YOU this cant be real SHOW THEM I'M RIGHT!!! Perfect even in death, My daughters you were, My daughters you'll always be And three - That is us; Aaliyah, Nevaeh, and Me
I found out that I was pregnant at Walmart, the night before my birthday. Yes I was young but as I was growing up I never had a childhood it was either be a child at age 14 and not eat. Or be out on the streets having to sell drugs to put food on the table(my childhood still haunts me till today). So I was so exticed, plus I was engaged to my fiance, my life was perfect! Than a few weeks later I started to bleed so my fiance was at work and told me to go staight to the hospital. So I went and went threw fast tract, and was waiting for fast tract. Than she finally came in and she started the ultrasound. The whole time I was asking is my baby ok? Finally she said yes would you like to see a picture. I was so happy yes please let me see my child. She showed me one picture and than one picture. I thought it was the same baby just different angle. Than she no look theres one baby and theres another TWINS. I started to cry I was so happy. As the doctor came in he told me that my babies where identical and that they had Twin to Twin Transfusion. That hurt me because they gave my babies no hope. I had to go in once a week for an ultrasound and was on bed rest. Than at 21 weeks I went to find out what I was having they thought that they where girls but wanted to be 100% sure. As the lady came in she and was doing the ultrasound she wasn't saying anything, or answering me. I kept asking is my babies ok?? Than she looked at me and said I'm sorry there is no heart beat. I crused at her I said how could you tell a mother those lies. I cried the whole time. Than she transfered me the labor level which hurt like hell. Not only did I have to go threw birth to sleeping angels, but I got to see happy mothers! So they induced my labor at 4pm. Around 4 in the morining my contractions started to get really worse. So they gave me an epidural, than my water broke! My child was about to be born and even tho they said that they passed away I was still hoping that they would move or breath just something, they where so active. Than at 4 19 my baby was born, its a girl. Aaliyah Angelic Mayo 12.8 ozs and 7 inches long, I was so happy a baby girl I was so lucky. Than at 4 45 I started to push and Nevaeh was born! Another girl!!!!!!!!!!! She weighed 14.9 ozs and was 7 1/2 inches long. I was so lucky to preicous daughters just for me my flesh and blood. After they where born I couldn't push their placenta out all of the way and I started to hemorrhage. I filled up 6 bed pans and than I started to lose loss consciousness they rushed me as fast as they could to the e.r. for an a&c for my organs started to shut down. Half of me whishes that they woud of let me be and sleep and be with my daughters. I had to have 4 blood transfuisons inorder for me to live. I should of had another one but I didn't want it. So I was in the hospital for a week just fighting to live. So not only did my grandmother loss her great grandchildren she almost lost me to.
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