Title: 15 - The Squeewee Chronicles - London
Subheading:
by Finn C. M. Beauchamp
Sat 27 Dec 14 - 04:50PM



He laid in a mug of cocoa, on the table with The Queen again. By now he
spoke fairly good English, and so the translator simply sat on the
floor playing with his PSP.

Her Majesty was now accustomed to his drink-bathing, and was able to sip her tea without grimacing.

"So, Squeewee, you would like to move on?"

"Yesh, yourh majheshty."

"I understand. But, I do not believe I can cope without your exquisite lyrics each morning. And where shall you go?"

"Well, yourh masheshtee, I have created quite secretly a CD, filled
with my amazing shongsh. And, in ansher to yourh shecondh queshtion,
wherever I lay my hat, ish my home."

The Queen attempted to abstain from laughing at this quite obviously
inserted joke, that would only be funny to a small audience. She smiled
instead.

"I would yike to travew."

"Ah, my friend! You can travel anytime!"

"But your Masheshtee, when there is luxshoree, how can I reshisht shtaying?"

"You make a fair point. Please, play me your CD. After then, you are free to go."

So, the CD went on, and the translator turned up his headphones. After
45 minutes, it went off. Her Majesty wiped tears from her eyes.

"You're free to go."

Squeewee expressed his deepest gratitude for 10 minutes, and then got
out his cocoa, leaving a trail of brown footprints. Along came the
cushion, and he was escorted to his bedroom. Then, with his backpack,
he was escorted to the car. Then, he was driven out the gates.

Then he was dropped off. And there he was, in real london.

By then, Squeebrews were a part of life. So he didn't have to walk in
secrecy. He began to just walk. It felt good. He smiled, then tried
imitating the tourists around him. He decided to stop after they
glanced his way.

And then he spent the rest of the day being a tiny tourist. He saw Big
Ben, the London Eye, and of course, the HMS Belfast. He still says it
was the "biggest boat he's ever seen!".

However, particularly weird was going on a subway train. He remembers
it as the most terrifying experience of his life. First he had to wade
through hundreds upon thousands of tourist feet.

Then he encountered something truly frightening.

An escalator. For a sense of scale, imagine tens of 15-foot walls all
rising out of seemingly nowhere, over and over. Then imagine 50-foot
tourists constantly tramping all over them. Then imagine your wearing a
backpack, say, 2/3 of your weight and height.

Combine all of these together, then add the roar of eternal chatter,
trains and footsteps, all echoed from the subterreanian walls and and
bounced into your miniature ears.

You can now imagine why this was so terrifying for him.

He couldn't just stand there. But he felt petrified at the thought of
stepping on. But he did. He then felt extremely confident. Then he
looked down. He didn't feel so confident.

When he reached the top of the escalator, he felt a little faint. He then only remembers blackness.

Then when he was woken up, he was on a train seat, next to a 10-year old boy named Finn.

"....squueee...woo....eechh........ooch...Lon...don...eshcala...tooor!"

"I think he's waking up!"

?



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